@GirrlGenius: A book commits suicide every time you watch a reality show.
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@Henry_3k: When your wife asks if men think about sex every 7 seconds the correct answer is "I think of you all the time dear" & not "Sex with who?".
@brennadine: "How hard up for cash do you have to be to wear a chicken suit & wave at cars," I think, adjusting the beak protruding from my forehead
@Pink: There's a woman at breakfast with a mink purse. I guess it's important to skin an animal alive to keep your credit cards warm... Idiot