@GirrlGenius: A book commits suicide every time you watch a reality show.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@noog: Me: I wish Inigo Montoya appeared everytime “literally” is misused and did his “You keep saying that word“ bit Genie: That ones on the house
@uncle_fescue: Seriously how much of Krypton fell to earth and how do bad guys keep finding it? You're Superman, handle your shit. This ain't a game, dawg.
@cloudypianos: "someday this will all be yours" I say to my dogs, waving my arms wildly across a half empty plate of mexican food