@Douchekevin: A cash bar on parent / teacher interview nights would be a great fundraiser for schools.
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@KKAlThani: Hello is this NASA? Ya what will happen if the sun decided to come out at night? Is it still called night or morning? Hello?
@aPunch2theJunk: Ladies: If a man approaches you and he's wearing Crocs, hold perfectly still. Their vision is based off movement.
@squirrel74wkgn: Tried using a time machine to go back to my wedding day & talk some sense into a much younger me, but I got the date wrong.