@MeetingBoy: "A computer keyboard has more bacteria than a toilet seat." I don't doubt it, given the shit my boss sends us in email.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Iwriteforcats: I'm gonna leave this world just like I came in, dawg! "Yo, for sure. Kickin and screamin!" Nah, brah. On a giant spaceship.
@fro_vo: Me: I'm bored Dad: hi bored I'm dad Me: I'm hungry Dad: hi hungry I'm dad Me: I'm here's 20 dollars Dad: hi here's 20 dollars Me: thanks dad
@panmidwest: IMPROV COACH: you can't just decide last minute to skip practice ME: I really don't know what you want from me
@Junk_Boat: She told me she "literally died laughing," and that's when I realized she had to be a zombie and shot her in the face.