@Kyle_Lippert: A female contestant is on Wheel of Fortune. "Give me a D" she says. "She wants the D" Pat Sajak says & then high fives the camera man.
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@WilliamAder: Surprised Scarlett Johansson didn't leg sweep Travolta, throw him over her should onto his back and put her foot on his throat.
@E_lok44: The biggest problem with prison is that you can only rearrange your cell in so many ways because of where the toilet is.
@JaneBadall: In retrospect, the kidnapping was going according to plan until I blew my nose on the rag I'd soaked with chloroform.