@iwearaonesie: a fun thing to do if your wife leaves her fb open: post an argument you had but switch who said what and watch her friends agree with 'her'
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@LuvPug: My son asked me the definition of impending doom. I just said, 'you know when you smell dog poop in the house, but you can't see it? That.'
@jake_lach: Holy shit. I just realized this sales kid is treating me this way because he thinks I'm old
@BarndogKarck: Knew a guy who wore a shirt that just said "hentai" to work knowing his boss couldn't write him up without admitting he knew what hentai is