@Swishergirl24: A fun thing to yell at a magic show is "BURN HIM, HE'S A WITCH"
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@kelkulus: The American flags on the moon have been bleached white from 44 years of solar radiation. If aliens ever attack, we've already surrendered.
@TheMichaelRock: No thanks, flu shot. I look forward to three days off from work and returning looking like I was on a diet for six weeks.
@PinkCamoTO: If you think Lord of the Flies couldn't happen, you've clearly never seen a group of 7 year olds go after a piñata.