@causticbob: A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home.
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@DanMentos: One time in 1997 I forgot to close my air quotes so everything I've said since then has been sarcastic
@david8hughes: [picking son up from soccer practice] Me: how was it? Coach: he did very well Me: how many goals did you score? Son: none Me: right well one of you is a liar then
@daniel_shaw: If by cat person you mean I like to sleep all day and poo in sand then yes I am a cat person.