@yenniwhite: A GPS. But for where your story is going.
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@jonnysun: LIFE HACK: give ur next child a normal name ME: are u still mad that ur mother and i named u Life Hack
@JRobb773: Welcome to my bed and breakfast. You have the choice of being buried in the attic or basement. Just kidding! The haunted dolls decide.
@TheMichaelRock: Some schools are banning Santa so they don't offend non-Christian students. That sucks, because Santa is my favorite part of the Bible.
@thepunningman: [superhero meeting] "What's your enemy called?" "Dr Doom. Yours?" "Joker" [stifles laughter] "I HAVE OTHERS" "Ye-" "Penguin" [just loses it]