@mrtruthandsoul: A group of guys with ponytails is called a flock of Steven Seagulls
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@OhNoSheTwitnt: [coworker starts talking to me at my cubicle] Welp, nice chatting. This is my stop. [puts in earbuds]
@halvewit: I think my neighbor is very sick. I have now seen him putting no less than six of his arms in his garbage over the past year.
@_mindflakes: (boom boom clap) (boom boom clap) Daisy you're a dog you're a good dog Playing in the park Gonna eat some cool bugs today