@WheelTod: A guy I know got bitten by a radioactive bedbug. He spent 3 weeks in a coma, but when he came round again he was able to fold a fitted sheet
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@wickedimproper: Day One, living in one of those tiny houses: "Well, isn't this quaint?" Day Two: Murder
@KentWGraham: Misery loves company. And from what I can tell, the company she loves is the one where I work.
@KenJennings: Bad news, the police just seized our German holiday bread. They said it was stollen. Folks, they said it was stollen.