@krishna_van: A horse, a penguin and a chimp walked into a bar and that's when I realised I was drunk.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@DurtMcHurtt: *Asks soulmate* What is your dream car and why? Minivan, because the sliding door <joining in> MAKES IT EASIER FOR DRIVE-BY BAZOOKA ATTACKS
@OzCricketFan81: Take my daughter once, shame on you. Take her twice, shame on me. Take her 3 times, and you're ruining the franchise.
@pleatedjeans: [school teacher job interview] Can I ask you some questions? I don't know CAN you? haha impressive [stands] welcome aboard!
@juliussharpe: Million dollar idea - an app that connects you with other people eating beef jerky in their car.