@Bob_Janke: A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face and he says it's so when I'm eating prairie grasses I can see predators
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@mamatomy3: My son has stolen my iPad to play minecraft. Please retweet this so the notifications disrupt his playing.
@MichaelTrying: The moral of “The Three Little Pigs” is “make your house with bricks.” Why are we giving four year olds architectural advice?