@MrFornicator: A judge in Oklahoma City wed a couple and then sentenced the groom to prison. That sounds redundant to me.
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@iLikeCatShirts: *Australian accent* Notice the wife in her natural habitat shaming the male husband species into doing what she wants!
@Manda_like_wine: Eternal damnation for the sorry acquaintance who cons you into watching his favorite film and keeps looking to see if you're reacting.
@petemandik: In the future I will replace my feet with chainsaws after accidentally cutting them off with my chainsaw hands.
@KKAlThani: My friend showed up wearing a "Narnia is real" shirt which suits him cause they both aren't planning to come out of the closet anytime soon.