@KrunkedRobot: A kid at the park is wearing a Joker shirt, I am going to slowly take my coat off revealing my Batman T and shit is about to get real.
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@carlyken: Told my coworker I want a dragon. He said I'm crazy for wanting anything that might set all my shit on fire but he's the one that's married.
@Sulky_Girl: My therapist told me cats are not babys, so i let my let my baby shit in his office.
@TheToddWilliams: [first date] HER: I totally love Nirvana ME: Oh yeah? Name one of their albums HER: Nevermind ME Okay, forget about it then