@LuvPug: A kiss so passionate you have first degree burns from the melted cheese on the pizza.
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@SouthernStylin1: Either that loud scream was a patient yelling for help or Fred pulled the string on the bird's tail for quitting time- Why my cw hates me
@JakeNicholas: There's a man at the mall wearing cargo pants and a fanny pack, who I believe is in the process of becoming a suitcase.
@QwertyJones3: "Welcome to another meeting of Horse Club. Let's try to actually get something done today. All in favor?" Crowd: "NEIGH!" "Jesus Christ."
@miilkkk: If you come up to my bedroom door and find a sock on the knob it means I'm having sex. Probably with the other sock.