@omgthatspunny: A lawyer-turned-cook is a sue chef.
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@verycozy: Im sorry, but you only have two weeks to live *slides the doctor a five dollar bill* Ooooh make that 3 weeks buddy *winks at loved ones*
@UncleBob56: Nurse: What happened to your FINGERS? Me: You know those chefs who cut up vegetables real fast? N: Yes? M: I can't do that.
@courtneyno: The light above my desk is going out. I feel like I've been at a really boring rave for the last 7 hours.