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@fuglylife: A poem about bugs: If it can fly, it should die.
@baconNmeggs: With grape soda comes grape responsibility.
@JD_KC: Please stop throwing my only possession.
@AngelaEhh: Just tried to put my seatbelt on.
AT MY DESK.
@geraintgriffith: "This is the fourth lot of bacon to go missing this week. It can only mean one thing."
"What's that Sarge?"
"Someone's building a pig."
@kumailn: Shocking that people who've been physically assaulting each other for 3 hours would lose their tempers.