@abrosenthal: A study found that Buzzfeed is the least trusted news source in media. Serves them right for telling me I belong in Hufflepuff.
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@VaDawn13: Dear Restaurant Managers: If more than 3 employees ask me how I'm enjoying my meal, I begin to wonder if you know something I don't know.
@dmc1138: Someone should open a bar called "The Gym", so when I tell people where I'm going, it won't be a lie.
@JohnLyonTweets: Autocorrect is changing correctly spelled words. I'm starting to think it has a mind of its AUTOCORRECT IS HARMLESS. GO ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS.