@WilliamAder: A thing I learned at this week's staff meeting is that I have restless leg syndrome when I sleep.
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@EJGomez: me: annie are you ok so annie are you ok are you ok annie (X5) girl [wearing name tag that says annie]: sir will it be paper or plastic
@SteveKoehler22: One time, when the kids were teenagers, we tried to ditch them on a family holiday. It didn't work, unfortunately. They found us.
@Cheeseboy22: If I wanted to drive my wife insane, I'd secretly raise a colony of bees & place one new bee inside of her car each morning for ten years.
@highwaytohelv: I'm getting concerned that Beyonce never told those single ladies to put their hands down and now there's a bunch of unfed cats out there.