@MrPhetz: A TV weatherman who keeps accidentally calling the anchorwoman mom
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@kellyoxford: 7yr old "Do women get their periods on weekends too?" Me "Yes" 7yr old mutters to herself "Jesus Christ"
@dankashane20: I want to get a medical bracelet that says, "Shy" so I can I just hold it up during social situations.
@QwertyJones3: "Yes, I need to check in." "Sir, this is a burn unit." "Yeah, I got hit hard with a series of jokes about my mom, and I had no comeback."