@longwall26: A werewolf is chasing you. You're on a Segway. The werewolf is too. Both batteries are dying, and the chase gets slower and slower.
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@MrsGoose69: Before a long trip I drink allot of alcohol the night before. Dehydration will work for me for once.
@iwearaonesie: [3 am] toddler *steps on my face trying to sneak into the bed* me: You are the worst ninja ever