@whereami18: A woman just asked me to "unpark her car" and now I'm searching urban dictionary to see what I really just agreed to do
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@XplodingUnicorn: 4-year-old: I put my Barbie in the tanning bed. Me: You don’t have a Barbie tanning bed. 4: Me: *sprints to the toaster*
@Chel__CLE: Seriously ppl who eat pizza with a fork & knife? This is America. We shove it in our faces like the rest of the fat people. Get it together.
@markydoodoo: *sees a meteor* I wonder where that's landing. Maybe if I run fast enough I can get crushed by it.