@leslid79: Abra abracadabra. I wanna reach out and stab ya.
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@heymonroe: 14 year old me would be shocked to learn that knowing every word to Billy Joel's 'We didn't start the fire' has done nothing for our career.
@TarzanFeathers: Sperm can live inside a woman for like 2 weeks. Nine months if things go really wrong.
@bellicosejason: If you're behind someone at an ATM, let them know you're not a threat by gently kissing their neck.
@meganamram: Sometimes I sit on my hand till it's numb so it feels like someone else is googling my name