@shkeeber: Accepting a Facebook friend request from someone you follow on twitter is like bringing home your drug dealer to meet your family.
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@Steelers1972: I know I'm getting old when I see a beautiful 19 year old girl and I wonder what her mother looks like.
@TheTalkingPipe: This beautiful woman is winking at me right now. Now she's using the other eye. Oh never mind. She's falling asleep.