@kellysdf: According to the NSA, most of my calls are me saying, "I forgot what you told me to pick up at the store."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@chuuew: My friend's getting rich by selling photos of koi in clothes. He says it's as easy as shooting fish in apparel.
@squirrel74wkgn: Logic says the screw I dropped should be somewhere by my feet, but science says it's under the couch in the other room.
@JediGigi: Me: I don't feel well Mom: Did you eat the plastic fruit again, Gigi? Me: No Mom: ... Me: ... Mom: ... Me: *throws up plastic banana*