@SardonicTart: "Act your age!" I yell at my 11 year-old daughter as I put on my Captain America t-shirt.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@hythemafia: I've quit my new job as a postman..... .....they handed me my first letter to deliver, I looked at it and thought: "This isn't for me."
@Diversion50: My signature move is texting "There in 5" while I'm 80 miles away and embroiled in a Kung Fu Dance battle with an uncouth cattle farmer.
@ddsmidt: Caught the neighbor kid teasing my dog, so his mom told me to yell at him any time I like. I had a bad day, I'm gonna go see if he's home.