@AaronFullerton: Actors can get political in speeches if they want. Go for it. But imagine someone winning Wimbledon & going, "Yay! I won! Save the whales!"
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@Bob_Heller: Party Tip: At a 3-year-old's birthday party, you can piss all over the bathroom. ALL OVER!!!! Nobody will suspect you.
@thepunningman: [two women sunbathing in garden] "It's so nice out here" "Where's that creepy guy who lives next door?" HEDGE "He's away for the weekend"
@lisaxy424: I'm at the point in my life where "friend with benefits" just means a person who gives me their Bed Bath & Beyond coupons.
@jaggedape: Bear mace is like regular mace but you have to buy it at the maul... Thank you for your time.