@jrza84: Actually told a girl who's moving to France soon that "there's lots of French people over there". It's a wonder how I can even bathe myself.
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@heatherlou_: "IT WAS NEVER SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THIS!!!" I yell at the guy next to me at the red light while tweezing stray hairs from my chin.
@KeetPotato: therapist: "remember there are no stupid questions" wife: "okay" therapist: "keith you start" me: "do sharks ever need to have a bath?"