@CrazyClarine: After Paris my Airbnb host tried to say I stained her sheets & headboard w/ hair dye, but the gag is I don't wear hair to bed.
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@laurenmacdonald: There's a lot of strange facts in this world if you think about it. For example, some people like when there's pulp in their orange juice.
@shutupmikeginn: An old lady on the bus just tried to set me up with her daughter. Here's everything she knows about me: 1) I don't have a car