@Donna_McCoy: Ain't no sunshine when she's gone, but there sure are a lot of unauthorized charges on the credit card.
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@murrman5: "daddy I hear footsteps on the roof, it must be Santa" *checks santa tracker* new zealand? *grabs frying pan and knife* go get in bed, son
@tylerschmall: "Mr. President, you have some Updog in east Syria." "What's Updog?" "[unfurls projector screen] Updog is a military terrorist organizati