@SuperApple8: All I want in life is to be cool enough to cut up slices of an apple and eat them directly from the knife.
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@murrman5: [to the secretary before I go in for job interview] "when the music starts, hit this button and that will activate the fog machine"
@Book_Krazy: *In the elevator* Guy: Good morning ladies. You two going down? Me: No. We're just friends Guy: ....
@Cpin42: Crucifixion art is so depressing. Every time I look at Jesus, I can’t help thinking...I’ll never have abs like that.