@TheJamesH1: All my friends say that I'm a psychopath. That's not true, I don't have any friends.
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@AndyAsAdjective: Uncle Frank's will stipulates he be cremated & his ashes added to the vegetable water sprayers at the local grocery store. He will be mist.
@BuckyIsotope: *sits son down for the talk* You ready? “Yeah” Ok. When a man and a woman love each other- *pulls out Pokéball* -they throw this at a baby
@iamspacegirl: MY DATE WHO IS A SQUID: What movie should we see? ME, SECRETLY TRYING TO HARVEST HER INK: Something super scary *I empty my popcorn bucket*