@Mr_Kapowski: All my punishment tactics against my 8 year old were in vain until I threatened to transfer her most valued Pokémon to the Professor
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@VancityReynolds: Tinder isn't a babysitting app. Apologies to Crystal and Janine for the misunderstanding.
@itsthatAsh: Commas are the coolest punctuation, because they're like "Yeah, you haven't got time to stop, but you can chill for a little bit."
@timdonakowski: If I ever meet someone who's been in a coma since 2004, I'm trying to sell them a USB drive for $150.