@ramblinma: All these people training for marathons and I'm over here, on my couch, trying to lasso the remote with my phone charger.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@IGotsSmarts: HOT SINGLES IN YOUR AREA ARE BEING TURNED INTO GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICHES RIGHT NOW!
@OuterJohn: When people do a bunny impression they go straight for the cute little front paws. Not me. I fearfully sprint into traffic.
@iGreenMonk: I got a dig bick. You that read wrong. That awkward when you read that wrong too. And said 'moment' after awkward. This is awkward.