@lisaxy424: Always answer a math question in a silly voice because if you're wrong they'll think you're joking and if you're right they'll feel dumb.
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@dshack8: You don't know shit about pressure until you're the only Black person on the dance floor while white people clap & form a circle around you.
@IamEnidColeslaw: The Constitution says nothing about it being illegal for cats to carry firearms and this worries me immensely.
@ThaJawn: Interviewer: You're hired.. Me: Thank you so much! You won't live to regret this.. Interviewer: What? Me: huh?
@PeterClayton6: If you say 'my cocaine' really loudly, you will sound exactly like Michael Caine saying his own name. I will never get tired of this.