@MarcusTheToken: Always carry a newspaper or magazine so you appear to be preoccupied. - stalker handbook page 2 paragraph 3
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@Tmoney68: [Sloth Job Interview] Sloth Boss: How would you describe yourself? *2 hours later* Sloth Interviewee: Quick-thinking.
@IronWang: Me: Close your eyes. Give me your hand, darling. Can you feel my heart beating? Do you unders... Dr:(removes stethoscope) Really? Everytime?
@SatansTongue: *Vladimir Putin dining* I want Russian fries "They're French fries" Not for long *crosses Ukraine out on agenda & lists France* Not for long
@KeetPotato: wife: "this is really your idea of an anniversary present?" me: [on the other walkie talkie] "you didn't say over, over"