@sofarrsogud: *always thought 'copulation' was the amount of police officers in a given country.
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@murrman5: [wife yelling in waterpark] "BRENT SOMEONE IS STEALING THE CAR" [top of huge slide] K IM STILL GONNA TAKE THE SLIDE DOWN CUZ IT'll BE FASTER
@ItsAndyRyan: Doctor: "Why is my waiting room empty?" Judge: "I hauled everyone off to court" Doctor: "You're trying my patients"
@JustinGuarini: Have you ever accidentally ended a business call with "I love you?" Oh yeah me neither.