@topaz_kell: Ambien is not the answer, unless your neighbor questions why you were sleeping on their couch and where did their cheesecake go.
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@fro_vo: "Hey Cyclops are you still dating Jean?" "No Storm, we broke up. You could say she's my..." *lowers sunglasses* *eye beams obliterate Storm*
@novicefather: Meant to type "Lmaoooo" but left off the "L" and now she thinks I'm singing the praises of The People's Republic.
@FaisalAdam_: Asked a girl what I had to do to get her, she said, "GET LOST!" So I stared... Realising she wasn't saying more, I asked, "which season?"
@Ryan_Patricks: Pretend it's a beer... Pretend it's a beer... Pretend it's a beer... - Me trying not to drop a baby.