@Nickadoo: America. Where assault weapons will protect your family, but two dudes getting married will destroy your family.
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@CornOnTheGoblin: Optimus Prime: so it's settled. I'll be a huge cool truck, Bumblebee you're a camaro. Any questions? [Dan the station wagon raises his hand]
@5exyunchained: It’s a good thing not everyone has a smartphone. Someone has to honk when the light turns green.
@SgtButtCheeks: Saying 'Do you want to kiss me as much as I want to kiss you?' only works in the movies and not with strangers at Sports Authority
@FishySnowborder: Went out drinking at the bar last night. Took a cab home. Trying to figure out what to do with the cab in my garage?