@AnOrangeSNES: An app to tase restaurant owners who call appetizers "apps"
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@KentWGraham: How come I need a complex, indecipherable password to get on Twitter but only a 4-digit number to remove all my money from an ATM?
@CourtneyBale: Narrator: Here we see the Me: Here we see the N:...gazelle in M: the nature program narrator N: THE GAZELLE IN ITS M: WHOSE FOREHEAD VEIN IS
@Merman_Melville: Apple watch, loudly: "It is time for you to poop" Me: "A-as I was saying, our investors h-" Watch, louder: "It is your optimal poop time"
@JimmerThatisAll: This day in history. 2001. Holland legalized assisted suicide for those with terminal illnesses or "It's a Small World" stuck in their head.