@trevso_electric: And on the second day, God created the sunset and He saw that it was good but decided it would looketh better with the Amaro filter.
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@DaddyJew: *something breaks Me: hand me my tools 7: call someone for help Me: no 7 already on the phone: mom, he's trying to fix stuff again
@MartaEffing: Decorating my xmas tree after a bottle of wine. Mixed up a box of candy canes with a box of tampons. Tree looks weird and I feel minty.
@lovemyboots111: How do you know your man is cheating? When he drives by her place the wifi connects