@IncrediblyRich: And so it begins...
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@zoevsuniverse: 4-yr-old saw picture of me pregnant. I explain that she was inside me. She thought for a bit then said: "I never want to do that again."
@shadygrenade: *ransom note on gun* [1 million dollars by Friday or I shoot your daughter. No exceptions] [ps please mail gun back it's my only one]
@MartaEffing: I don't understand how wild bears can eat all that salmon without a squeeze of lemon and some sea salt.
@Phook75: Looking at our latest Comcast bill and I can only pray that our daughter has zero aspirations for college