@Brianhopecomedy: And the award for Best Actress goes to...*opens envelope*....my 4 year old daughter for her overly-dramatic scene in "Bath Time".
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@stevevsninjas: Bear Grylls: *cuts with knife* These can be edible, but I must avoid the toxic parts. Taco Bell Manager: You need permission to film in here
@TheCatWhisprer: MAN: [after being mauled by a bear] oh it's just a scratch MAN: [with a cold] omg i can't breathe i think i'm dying