@StarksWeek: I've been known to drive women crazy with my tongue. *never shuts the hell up*

@KrunkedRobot: Just burned 2000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at the grocery store.

@CooIStepDad: [zoo] "This is the bear kids" Wow I want his arms "What? You cant ha.." *kid shows tour guide 2nd amendment* "Bring him the arms smh"

@clindsaysway: A fun game is to put on an orange vest and direct traffic.

@bobbiejo448: Someone please tell my mother she won't get a free iPod by clicking the links. She's convinced I just don't want to show her how to use it.