@lovemyboots111: Apparently asking the boss " who ignited the fuse on your tampon?" will get you sent to HR.
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@claire_mudie: My boyfriend is watching Glee voluntarily and tapping his foot and smiling. That makes me a lesbian now, right?
@GianDoh: Freak out your neighbors by removing one member of their stick figure decal family each night.
@TheClingyGF: If you're not cheating on me, then why won't you let me install surveillance cameras in your house.