@HausOfAustin: Apple CEO announces he's gay. Samsung CEO announces he's more gay and water resistant.
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@AphroditeAfter5: Some of you need to be driven out to the country and released back into the wild
@Jn1fer: *Writes "For a good time call" on random gas station bathroom wall *adds work phone number *Gets excited about work today
@Schmoodles: Apparently, when your boss asks you to get a cake for a coworker's 60th birthday, 'cake' is not code for 'stripper.' Live & learn, guys.