@TheCatWhisprer: Are you supposed to wear the fanny pack over the gut or underneath it? I don't want to look like a dork.
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@moose_chocolate: "So you spend 6 bucks on a beverage that has no booze in it on purpose?" -me to everyone at Starbucks.
@AnkCoupleTO: Me: [stands under majestic tree watching leaves fall] This is beautiful [2 hours later buried under a mountain of leaves] you piece of shit