@JeremyKCMO: As a 37 year old man, I feel like I should know how to spell Febuary.
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@KalvinMacleod: WIFE: you can't just deep-fry everything ME: what do you mean? WIFE: I mean put down the cat
@DamienFahey: I just dropped my phone in the toilet and for a second I stood over it and thought, "That's where it belongs."
@electrolemon: to discover what's going on with justin bieber we caught up with his manager scooter braun, who is named after two different types of razors