@TheDairylandDon: As I basted the turkey, I swear I heard it say "just not in my hair"
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@shawnspree: To catch a woman, one must think like a woman. *places glass of wine, and Channing Tatum dvd on mouse trap
@protolalia: Me: You're kidnapping me? Where're we going? Can we feed my cats first? Is there a ransom? Cool van. My name- Him: Changed my mind. Get out.
@RoosterMustache: HER: I love sweater weather ME: *holding up an umbrella to protect us from falling sweaters* It's that time of year again already?!
@dvoted_hubsand: I cant use facebook cuz everyone making popular comment I wish I thought of first, like "thank God it Friday!" or "Im pregnant of baby"