@Duke1173: As I get older and continue to meet new people... I realize that swallowing should be more of a thing.
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@Michael_Erhart: Girl: I only date guys who can ice skate and make puns. Me: *sighs and reluctantly starts putting on skates* "Figures."
@bourgeoisalien: I'm so lazy, if I got kidnapped I’d just think, “Well, this is where I live now.”
@Sarcasticsapien: I wanna learn to speak Italian. Partially to go to Italy but mostly so I can pretend I don't know English when people wanna make small talk.
@1_swarthy_dude: You have to kiss a lot of short, black, flamboyant musicians before you can find your Prince.